Hello,
Today I have decided to write a weekly blog in the face of all the doom and gloom that we are being exposed to every day. Our family has suffered as well during this bleak time. We lost our beautiful Lab, Guinness unexpectedly two weeks ago. In her honor around this St Patrick’s day, where we usually congregate in parades and pubs, I am putting out in the universe this positive coaching blog to help people make some sense of all the bad news.
I am a 15 year professional coach. I have earned a coaching certification with the international Coach Federation and have been helping people figure out how best to cope with their personal and professional lives. If people are looking for answers maybe this blog will help them figure this out a bit or at least help to keep their stress levels down.
Feeling out of control, in a free fall spiral, is to say the least, very unsettling. Wanting to keep ourselves and our family safe in these times, seems almost impossible. The reality of the times is that at this point we really do not know what to expect. These times remind me of the feelings I had during the 9/11 uncertainty. Are we under attack? Will we ever feel safe again? We adjusted and our resilience and grit has helped us through those bleak times and I believe we will rally again.
The biggest feeling is that we feel we are out of control, coupled with the unrelentless negative information that today’s media and social network sites are spreading. So where do we start to feel at least some resemblance of getting back in control? As a professional coach, our job is to bring awareness to our clients. One of the ways coaches do this is through asking open ended probing questions. As your personal virtual coach let’s explore what you can do or think about to ease the pain a bit.
- Let’s first start by answering these three questions. What you are grateful for in your life today? This may be hard for you to see at this time, but make an effort and you WILL feel better! I suggest you write down all those things that you are grateful for and you may even want to do a family grateful list. Post it in a place where it can be seen and have an impact of refocusing your negative thoughts.
- The second question you can ask yourself is what are you in control of? We don’t have control over the dreadful disease at the moment, but we do have control over many things in our life. Certainly, staying out of the path of the virus by self quarantining. Making choices with out investments in unsure times. If the market is making you feel uneasy, what are your choices? You may not have control over if the market or your investments go up or down, but you do have control over such things as staying in the market, getting out until things calm down, reinvesting during lower prices, change the investments you have, diversify, etc. See, you do have many choices that you are in control of.
- The third question is what are you doing to be in action? There is a recognized quote that states “An idle mind is the devil’s playground.” What does sitting around and just thinking about the virus, the state of the economy, or what does this all going to mean for me and my family accomplish? What is the negative effect on you of where your mind might take you when boredom takes hold? Here again, relief comes from refocusing your thinking by being in action. Read a book, bake a cake, home repair, exercising, etc. Whatever it is, staying in action is the key to a heathier mind and body.
The takeaways here are three-fold. Focus on what are you grateful for and focus on those areas that you have control over and stay in action. Let’s take it one day at a time, and like past history, we will weather this storm as well. Remember, it’s not what happens to us, but rather our reaction to it. And what we focus on we bring into our lives.
So, since we do have a choice, let’s all make positive focused choices!!
Jonathan Aronson
Jonathan Aronson is a Professional Coach for the past 15 years. He has coached thousands of hours, helping his clients achieve personal and professional goals.